...all that grey matter

You know what I'm talking about - the stuff that is not black and white. :) J/K! I've been thinking a lot about how difficult it is to be a Christian sometimes. There are those things that the Bible explicitly tells us to do: spread the Word, love others, get to know Christ as the number one thing, etc. There are also the things that the Bible explicitly tells us NOT to do: kill, lie, covet, be jealous, etc.. Then there is everything in between: what I call, the grey stuff. And, sheesh, there is a whole lot of it. When I became a parent, there is even more of it I have to deal with because, I guess, there are more parties involved. Sometimes, talking about that stuff makes me a bit tense, and I have to go back to what God has taught me about them.

[For those that care to know what some of those 'grey matter' can be in my life:
-Homeschool vs Public School
-Whether or not to use Birth Control
-How to discipline kids (ie spanking or not)
-How to raise kids (ie attachment parenting, etc)
-Staying at home or work
and blah, blah, blah....they carry so much emotion for me as I think or talk about them, so I know that making decisions about these things mean a lot to me. ]

So, what have I learned? Honestly, for me, there is no one correct answer for everyone. Yes, I've read articles and had discussions on the biblical basis for homeschooling or attachment parenting. But the thing is, it's a lot how you interpret scripture and how far you want to extrapolate the meaning. I really feel that the Bible remains 'grey' about these issues because there is no universal answer that applies to everyone. So, where does that leave me? It leaves me with the fact that God has given me certain personalities and traits that make me who I am and how I'm prone to handle things. So, that might skew me towards one way or the other or a mix of the 2 extremes. I do believe that God gave me those traits for a reason and that it's ok to go my own path, if I choose. I'm also left with the fact that God will tell me if he wants us to choose a certain path for our family, which reminds me that the prerequisite for hearing his voice is to stay close to Him. Still working on that. :) But at least I do tell Him that I value His opinion and want to please Him with what I do. :D And when He stays silent, I feel the ok to go with what I want. [At least that's what I got out of a certain Graham Cooke tape and man, that revelation was soo freeing for me!!]

The hard part for me is that I'm a people person [read: people pleaser] for the most part. I find myself oftentimes being very emphathetic towards others and then see how both sides could work for me. And that leaves me right back where I usually start, in the middle. ;) In the past, I also try to please others first, esp my parents, but now I realized I can (and should) please God and still honor others. The flip side is that I feel badly when I feel strongly about an issue because I feel like I can't see the opposing view at all and fear I will end up judging them. That is something I'm still working on. Life is to short to judge other or be mean, that's what I figure. Anyhow, I wanted to leave this post with something totally irrevelant but light-hearted and happy....

We had ordered something from Gap online a while ago and I had kinda forgotten about it. [Yeah, it's true, it wasn't something we NEEDED. ::sheepish::] Anyhow, I remembered to check on the shipment status today and saw that it was delivered on the 27th. But, wait, it's the 28th and I didn't get a pkg!? So, I investigate and found out that it was delivered to our old place in NEW JERSEY!!! Doh! What to do? I decided to call my old real estate agent to see if she can figure out a way for us to contact the new owner. After a very nice conversation, she assures me that she will go by the house [she lives very close to it] to leave a note for the owner to call her and will also call the owner's agent in the morning. A few hours later, I get a call from the agent and she said that she had the owner on the phone b/c he happened to be home when she knocked on his door. He kindly asked for our Florida address and told me that he would ship it there tomorrow, no problem, since he works for UPS anyways. And, get this, he wanted to pay for shipping!?!?!! That was such a blessing for me! He even went on to ask about the kids [he had come over a few times while checking out the house and had met the kiddies - Jana, esp., took a liking to him.]. Anyhow, it was just a reminder to me that there are still lots of nice people out there. I'm sure you knew that already but sometimes I forget. :) And re: shipping stuff, I had ordered a pair of shoes from Zappos.com around 10:30pm on Friday night and got a package Saturday morning at 9am?!?! I know they offer free overnight shipping but, man, do they not sleep? Haha! Anyways, I'm super impressed! Alrighty, storytime is over - I'm going to bed. G'night!